California, Here We Come!

California, Here we come!
July 6, 2006

Not a lake - that's torrential rain falling on the sand just outside of Vegas!

Leaving Las Vegas, we headed south to pick up Route 66 near Kingman, AZ. First, though, Kelly really wanted to see the famed London Bridge… now located in Lake Havasu, AZ. Apparently, when the City of London needed to replace the outmoded bridge in the 1960’s, they offered it for sale and the then-mayor of the tiny town of Havasu figured this would be just the keystone upon which to stimulate commerce in the region. So he paid something like $2.4 million (in 1960s dollars) plus the substantial cost of shipping and reassembling the bridge in Arizona. I have heard tell from folks in London that the guy who bought the bridge thought he was buying the famed Tower Bridge that is often featured in London adverts and montages along with Big Ben and Buckingham Palace. As you can see, London Bridge, which does offer a fine view of Tower Bridge being about half a mile further up the Thames, is really rather ordinary. It is also demonstrably not falling down.

London Bridge - alive and well in Arizona?

Is it a bus or an ice cream shop?! Who cares - it's tacky!

Is she back in London? No, silly! She's in Arizona!

Beth is still particularly disturbed by the flock of pigeons living around the bridge (which is, again, in the middle of the desert). We had not seen pigeons since… Chicago? Maybe St. Louis. And the fact that the gift shop sells ‘pigeon food’ (do they not know that pigeon food is, essentially, just trash?) makes us strongly suspect that the pigeons were imported as well, along with a rusty double-decker bus and dilapidated red phone booth. (Beth wants Melissa to know that we did not eat any pigeons).

Pigeons - not native desert birds.

Delightfully tacky tourist emporia and retirement communities have, indeed, sprung up to serve gawkers like us. I don’t know how profitable this has been, however, as we spent all of $2 on postcards, plus another $0.50 at the first lemonade stand we’d seen the entire trip. (These little entrepreneurs were great! They set up in the shade under the bridge and offered fine lemonade with a lime garnish for just a quarter a cup. In the 114-degree heat, it was a refreshing find!).

The next Apprentice?

Leaving London Bridge, we attempted to rejoin Route 66, with an eye to making it to Riverside, CA in time for dinner with Kelly’s old grad school friend, Jaya. Well, after just one mile on our old buddy, the faulty signage struck again and we found ourselves not on the road to nowhere, but literally IN nowhere. I say literally because there were no landmarks whatsoever and we could not find ourselves on a map to save our lives. Midge gave up. Eventually, we found ourselves in Oatman, AZ, which prides itself on the wild asses that roamed the streets. They were not helpful in direction giving, but the burros were. Thus located, we realized we’d been driving through a Native American reservation, and it struck us: the U.S. government has given the Native Americans some really strikingly beautiful land. But also utterly useless. Hot, dusty, and barren. I’m so proud.

Yee-ha!

We entered California through the Mojave Desert. After a quick pit stop at Needles (birthplace of Charles Shultz and home to Snoopy’s brother, and Kelly’s computers’ namesake, Spike). Towns were vying with each other for title of most ridiculously low population: Goff: population 23; Fenner: 14, Essex: population 1 gas station, etc. How often are these signs updated, we wondered? Our detour to Oatman put us way late for dinner with Jaya, who, since she now has a very charming little 1.5 year old boy, keeps an earlier schedule than the likes of us. We were hoping to find camping near San Bernardino, but no luck. We also realized that the oldest McDonald’s was located there, so decided to dine there instead. Of course, once we found it, it was closed. So we dined at another one around the corner – good enough. It was late and we were hungry. Pretty much the primary justification for most McDining. Given that there were no campsites in the vicinity, we spent the next hour searching for a reasonably priced hotel with none of the following in the parking lot: drug dealers, prostitutes, or a flotilla of police cars dealing with drug dealers and prostitutes. Seriously, this place was Reno 911. We did not find such a reasonably priced hotel, so we settled for just “hotel” and splashed out on a very smart Comfort Inn – the Simpsons was playing in the lobby, the visible security guard was friendly, and free breakfast of Krispy Kreme donuts was offered until 11! Plus, wifi and pillows that Beth wanted to steal (but didn’t, because that would be wrong). Oh, happy day.

Evening in the Mojave Desert along Route 66

July 7, 2006
Riverside, CA
We rose the next morning to meet up with Jaya for lunch. She wanted to show us the ‘good side’ of Riverside and led us to the Mission Inn for lunch. What an oasis! This is a really beautiful building in the historic downtown area where, as it turns out, Richard Nixon was married. Very lovely Spanish style architecture – it reminded me of the Alhambra in Spain. Jaya then took us back to her parents’ house where she’s visiting so we could meet her “better half”, Amartya – he literally ran circles around her! He’s adorable and such a charmer. To all the under-5 females out there – watch out for this one!

1.5 year old single worldly male seeks feisty lady for running and frolicing.
Large collection of Fisher Price a plus...
Kelly and her old friend Jaya - one fiesty broad.

Unfortunately, we had to leave way earlier than we’d have liked in order to make it to Laguna in time for the Pageant of the Masters. No photography allowed, but check out here to see more. For the past 74 years, each summer, the local arts community produces a show in which famous art comes to life. It was not just paintings, as we’d imagined, but also sculptures, advertising posters, and even art deco perfume bottles! The backdrops are recreated and real human beings assume the roles of figures in the paintings. The theme this year was Passion and the narration and music really made for an astounding experience. Occasionally, you could see the figures in the painting assuming their roles – really providing the sensation that the artist captures a fleeting moment in time – a woman adjusting her hat, a man kneeling to catch his staggering toddler, friends raising their drinks in a toast… we LOVED it and this paragraph hasn’t begun to describe the experience. We are going back. You should all go, too.

We reach the Pacific in Laguna and Beth watches the surfer boys.